I start by putting 2T coconut oil in my cast iron Dutch oven on medium heat
Throw diced jalapeño in, dice Gaelic and toss it in and either roast your pen peppers or rinse jarred type, chop and throw them in.
After sweating them in the pan, pour 2 c milk, 6 c water and 4 t butter. Salt and pepper
Bring to a boil, and add 2 c quick cooking grits. Stirring so it doesn't burn being back to boil and boil about 5 mins.
It will thicken as the grits soak up the liquid. Take off burner and let sit a few mins and it will thicken more.